Welcome to CarmellaVanVleet.com!

Signs You’re a Parent of an Elementary School Student

10. You get excited when spiral notebooks go on sale for a dime.

9. You can rattle off the pediatrician’s address and phone number because you’ve had to write it dozens of times.

8. You have no clue what “New Math” is. (But you do know your child is learning it.)

7. You’ve been up until midnight baking cupcakes because your child forgot to tell you – until bedtime- that he volunteered you to bring snacks the next day. (“And oh, by the way, they can’t have chocolate, sugar, milk or peanuts in them.”)

6. Before buying shoes, you rub them on the linoleum to be sure they don’t scuff.

5. You don’t need to buy scratch paper because you get forms and notes in triplicate every school day.

4. You’ve had to toss out a thermos because someone-who-shall-remain-nameless left uneaten mac-n-cheese in it for a week.

3. You have sent a child you thought was “faking” to school only to be called before the first bell because she threw up on the bus.

2. The words “Teacher Gift” make you break out in a cold sweat.

1. The walls of your home are covered in artwork!

Inspired by How To Handle School Snafus: a Go Parents! guide by Carmella Van Vleet (Nomad Press, November 2004).